My brain's contents are as follows:
surreelust:

This is a t-shirt that you can actually buy if you roam around enough on the Internet.


Would buy if his name was spelt right…. :(

surreelust:

This is a t-shirt that you can actually buy if you roam around enough on the Internet.

Would buy if his name was spelt right…. :(

lanturd:

Wow I can’t believe I just hit 4000 followers! Hundreds are injured. My fists are sore and the police are coming.

My German Teacher (in German): We have an observer here today but he doesn’t speak any German so we can talk about him and how stupid his tie is.

murphels:

ugh this illegal copy i downloaded is of shitty quality

THIS IS NOT WHAT I DIDN’T PAY FOR.

I showed my boyfriend a picture of a cat in a suit

Me: “If I looked like this, would you love me forever?”
Him: “if you took a picture like that, i’d love you forever.”
Me: “I did! I did take that picture.”
Him: “Oh yeah? Where did you get the cat?”
Me: ” From… the.. cat store?”
Him: “Which cat store?”
Me: “Uhh the one at Strathpine. Um… Buckby Street.. Cat store…”
Him: “So if I googled it right now… It will show up..”
Me: “….yes.”
Him: “Nevermind. I believe you.”

Ten minutes later - I send him this link.

His love is now forever miiiine!! HAHAHA! OUR LOVE IS BUILT ON LIES! AHAHAHH!

shego:

people who laugh so hard at their own jokes that they can’t even finish the joke because they’re laughing so hard are my favorite kind of people

sexioto:

that boy you just called gay? well he is gay. he’s your boyfriend. both of you are gay. how do you keep forgetting this, jeffery

electric-blaze:

GENIUS!

electric-blaze:

GENIUS!

yourfictionmyreality:

Social justice bloggers.

lavender-ice:

darthmoonmoon:

doritofu:

hifumiyamadadono:

buttselfie:

nylonsubmissive:

ladydontmind:

freeing-my-mind:

nep-to-the-dubstep:

usbdongle:

raphnarock:

I’m going to assume this has happened to anyone who’s ever cuddled anyone and has a penis.
Source (find the exact comic yourself; at least I linked you to the webpage)

no, no, dont do this, please, if you are cuddling w/ me your boner is like a compliment and i welcome you to grind that shit into the back of my legs

same

same

if we are spooning and there isn’t a boner pressed into my butt I will assume you don’t actually like me and get really upset

Bones next to the butt are nice

Butt bones are the best bones.

where the women of tumblr make me feel better about having a boner when cuddling



Basically.

I’m laughing so hard

lavender-ice:

darthmoonmoon:

doritofu:

hifumiyamadadono:

buttselfie:

nylonsubmissive:

ladydontmind:

freeing-my-mind:

nep-to-the-dubstep:

usbdongle:

raphnarock:

I’m going to assume this has happened to anyone who’s ever cuddled anyone and has a penis.

Source (find the exact comic yourself; at least I linked you to the webpage)

no, no, dont do this, please, if you are cuddling w/ me your boner is like a compliment and i welcome you to grind that shit into the back of my legs

same

same

if we are spooning and there isn’t a boner pressed into my butt I will assume you don’t actually like me and get really upset

Bones next to the butt are nice

Butt bones are the best bones.

where the women of tumblr make me feel better about having a boner when cuddling

Basically.

I’m laughing so hard

4lungboy:

kegelking:

fuks:

egg frozen in ice

Look like a titty

u ever seen a titty son

4lungboy:

kegelking:

fuks:

egg frozen in ice

Look like a titty

u ever seen a titty son

website: You have to be over the age of 18 to enter this site.
me: haha lol yeah sure i am *clicks*
me:
me: wait i'm 20 years old

What if all .jpgs were .gifs - we just didn’t look at them for long enough?

vincecarters:

kyogenic:

vincecarters:

vincecarters:

if you haven’t read house of leaves, read house of leaves

image

you should really read house of leaves

Sorry I don’t want neck cramps :/

i’m like 80% sure books can be rotated